Bates soccer, hottest team in the NESCAC. After wins over MIT, Middlebury (reigning National champs by the way), Wesleyan and Colby, we're moving on to the playoffs. Apparently, in the pressure packed Bates/Colby game, Bates was down 1-0, and came back to win 2-1. Now, I'm getting my information second hand, but some player from Bates put some kid from Colby in a headlock and started throwing punches...and only got a yellow card. How insane is that? I guess the refs were calling it loose.
Looks like we drew Williams in the first round. Tough draw.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Salvation Army
I travelled to Salvation Army yesterday for a little Halloween costume shopping. I stopped at the store on 23rd and 2nd and rifled through their selection of used sports coats. Granted, this was only one day before Halloween, but selection was limited. Perhaps NYU students had already purchased every pastel sport coat.
If you've ever been lucky enough to enter a Salvation Army in Lewiston, ME, then you can attest to their quality. Unreal stock of hideously ugly pants and jackets. The Salvation Army in New York looked like a Men's Warehouse store. The key for Salvation Army is not to sell discounted sports coats from today, but to sell really, really ugly clothes from the 70's and 80's. Lewiston should change their slogan to "Best Salvation Armies on the East Coast."
Georgia Closes Schools Becuase of UF/UGA Game
If there was ever a doubt whether athletics or education come first in Georgia, this pretty much settles it.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
State by State Predictions
With the election drawing to a close, I'll bring you election analysis you can't get anywhere else. Here are my state by state predictions.
Obama:
Total - 260
As you can see, I'm forecasting an Obama win, but he has to sweat it out until the very end. I'm not as convinced as some that Obama takes swing states like Virgina and Florida.
Obama:
WA-11
OR-7
CA-55
NV-5
CO-9
NM-5
MN-10
WI-10
MI-17
IL-21
IA-7
ME-4
NH-4
VT-3
MA-12
RI-4
CT-5
NY-31
PA-21
NJ-15
DE-3
MD-10
DC-3
HI-4
-----
Total -- 278
AZ-10
UT-5
WY-3
ID-4
MT-3
ND-3
SD-3
NE-5
KS-6
OK-7
TX-34
LA-9
AR-6
AK-3
MS-6
AL-9
MO-11
IN-11
OH-20
KY-8
TN-11
GA-15
FL-27
SC-8
NC-15
VA-13
WV-5
Total - 260
As you can see, I'm forecasting an Obama win, but he has to sweat it out until the very end. I'm not as convinced as some that Obama takes swing states like Virgina and Florida.
DC is suffering
Congratulations to Philly fans. The Phillies won the World Series last night ending a 25 year drought without any any championships from their four major teams.
Now, what city is suffering the most?
Cities with four major sports and their last championship:
Philly--2008 Phillies
Boston--2008 Celtics
Detroit--2007-08 Red Wings
New York--2007 Giants
Miami--2006 Heat
Chicago--2005 White Sox
Denver--2000-01 Avalanche
Dallas--1999-99 Stars
Atlanta--1995 Braves
San Fran (if you include San Jose)--1994 49ers
Minny/St. Paul--1991 Twins
Washington--1991 Redskins
Washington and Minneapolis are now tied for the longest drought. Yes, DC only got a baseball team a few years ago. Yes, Maryland won a college bball championship in 2001. Yes, DC United has won 4 MLS titles. But the fact remains...DC is now the longest suffering city without a championship.
Now, what city is suffering the most?
Cities with four major sports and their last championship:
Philly--2008 Phillies
Boston--2008 Celtics
Detroit--2007-08 Red Wings
New York--2007 Giants
Miami--2006 Heat
Chicago--2005 White Sox
Denver--2000-01 Avalanche
Dallas--1999-99 Stars
Atlanta--1995 Braves
San Fran (if you include San Jose)--1994 49ers
Minny/St. Paul--1991 Twins
Washington--1991 Redskins
Washington and Minneapolis are now tied for the longest drought. Yes, DC only got a baseball team a few years ago. Yes, Maryland won a college bball championship in 2001. Yes, DC United has won 4 MLS titles. But the fact remains...DC is now the longest suffering city without a championship.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Week 9 Picks
Week 9 Picks
Jaguars (-6.5) over BENGALS
Since it looks like Carson "ohhh, my knee! I think it's broken" Palmer is most likely out for the year, it means the Hahvahd guy is slinging to rock to Houshmanzadeh and Ocho Stinko for the remainder of the season. Yeah, it sucks if you drafted those guys.
CHIEFS (+7.5) over Bucs
Tyler Thigpen's new name will be Not That Bad Thigpen since he almost led the Chiefs to an improbable upset over the Jets. Tyler Thigpen--not that bad. The only players worth starting in this game are Bowe, Gonzo and Garcia (but only if you drafted Brady, Palmer, Romo and Hasselbeck with your first four picks).
Ravens (+1.5) over BROWNS
The Browns team looked pleasantly frisky in the last two games, which automatically means they will lose this game. LeBron McLean, Ray Ray Rice and the RB from the U are all worth owning if you play in a 30 team league. Otherwise, don't start these guys.
Jets (+5.5) over BILLS
Leon Washington looked great last week against the Chiefs, and perhaps is worth a pickup if your a Thomas Jones owner. But lets be realistic, it's Leon Washington and unless he breaks off another 60 yard run, he isn't scoring in this game.
RAMS (+3.5) over Cardinals
Go pick up Donnie Avery in your league if he is unowned. I'll wait. You're back? Great. Now start Avery for the rest of the season since there was a reason he was the first rookie WR drafted during the April draft.
BEARS (-12.5) over Lions
Buy, buy, buy. Sell, sell, sell. Buy Orton, sell Forte. I think Orton keeps up this staggering clip and finishes as a top-10 QB this season. Forte? He's been great, but rookie RB's inevitablly hit a wall in November when they realize they have to play more than 12 games and don't get a month off during December before bowl games.
Packers (+5.5) over TITANS
You know what I just said about rookie RB's? That doesn't apply to Chris Johnson, who is an absolute stud. As for the Packers, I think they get on a mini roll here and bang out a couple of wins, including upsetting the previously unbeaten Tennessee Titans.
Dolphins (+2.5) over BRONCOS
You know why I'm taking the Dolphins here? Besides the fact I'm doing the opposite of what my brain tells me, take a look at the picture below. What is Cutler doing playing beirut during a bye week. The guy is a friggin NFL quarterback. I except him to drink nothing but water, gatorade and the occasional muscle milk beverage.
RAIDERS (+3.5) over Falcons
Can Tommy Cable please start playing McFadden. I mean the guy was a top-4 pick in the draft for a reason. I don't care if he has turf toe, just let him run in the open field and see what happens.
Cowboys (+7.5) over GIANTS
This game has Eli Manning stink fest written all over it. If the Dallas defense can play with the same grit and toughness they displayed in their last game, they have a shot even if Brooks Bollinger is throwing slant passes to Patrick Crayton.
SEAHAWKS (+7.5) over Eagles
I think this is a high scoring affair with Westbrook, McNabb, Jackson, Engram, J. Jones and a warm body at WR for Seattle all having big days. Additionally Holmgren and Reid can battle it out for the last XXXXXL jacket to wear on the sideline.
COLTS (-4.5) over Patriots
This game doesn't quite have the same meaning as last years slugfest, but somehow should still be a high scoring game. Wayne, Clark (damn you Clark for costing me a W one league), Pey-Pey, Moss, BenJarvus and Faulk all have big games in this one.
Steelers (+2.5) over REDSKINS
Ahh, my beloved Redskins. I don't ask for much, but if you could win this game and shut the Steelers fans traps for one week, I would really appreciate it. Our defensive doesn't have Jason Taylor and Shawn Springs, but then again the Steelers are really banged up as well. I see a really low scoring game, with maybe one combined touchdown. I really like Shaun Suisham and Jeff Reed in this game.
Last week: 5-9
After last weeks 5-9 debacle, I've decided to try a new approach. I pick a team to cover the spread, and then go with the other team. In the words of George Costanza, "if every instinct I have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right."
Additionally, I'll be doling out free fantasy football advice since in one of my leagues I'm 2-6 and obviously know what I'm talking about. On to the week 9 picks!
Home team in caps.
VIKINGS (-4.5) over Texans
Miami. Detroit. Cinci. These three team are Houston's past three opponents. If you're a Schaub, Johnson or Slaton owner, now is the time to deal these guys since their value will never be higher. Not that you're trading Andre Johnson, I'm just saying he can't keep up this crazy pace.Jaguars (-6.5) over BENGALS
Since it looks like Carson "ohhh, my knee! I think it's broken" Palmer is most likely out for the year, it means the Hahvahd guy is slinging to rock to Houshmanzadeh and Ocho Stinko for the remainder of the season. Yeah, it sucks if you drafted those guys.
Tyler Thigpen's new name will be Not That Bad Thigpen since he almost led the Chiefs to an improbable upset over the Jets. Tyler Thigpen--not that bad. The only players worth starting in this game are Bowe, Gonzo and Garcia (but only if you drafted Brady, Palmer, Romo and Hasselbeck with your first four picks).
Ravens (+1.5) over BROWNS
The Browns team looked pleasantly frisky in the last two games, which automatically means they will lose this game. LeBron McLean, Ray Ray Rice and the RB from the U are all worth owning if you play in a 30 team league. Otherwise, don't start these guys.
Jets (+5.5) over BILLS
Leon Washington looked great last week against the Chiefs, and perhaps is worth a pickup if your a Thomas Jones owner. But lets be realistic, it's Leon Washington and unless he breaks off another 60 yard run, he isn't scoring in this game.
RAMS (+3.5) over Cardinals
Go pick up Donnie Avery in your league if he is unowned. I'll wait. You're back? Great. Now start Avery for the rest of the season since there was a reason he was the first rookie WR drafted during the April draft.
BEARS (-12.5) over Lions
Buy, buy, buy. Sell, sell, sell. Buy Orton, sell Forte. I think Orton keeps up this staggering clip and finishes as a top-10 QB this season. Forte? He's been great, but rookie RB's inevitablly hit a wall in November when they realize they have to play more than 12 games and don't get a month off during December before bowl games.
Packers (+5.5) over TITANS
You know what I just said about rookie RB's? That doesn't apply to Chris Johnson, who is an absolute stud. As for the Packers, I think they get on a mini roll here and bang out a couple of wins, including upsetting the previously unbeaten Tennessee Titans.
Dolphins (+2.5) over BRONCOS
You know why I'm taking the Dolphins here? Besides the fact I'm doing the opposite of what my brain tells me, take a look at the picture below. What is Cutler doing playing beirut during a bye week. The guy is a friggin NFL quarterback. I except him to drink nothing but water, gatorade and the occasional muscle milk beverage.
RAIDERS (+3.5) over Falcons
Can Tommy Cable please start playing McFadden. I mean the guy was a top-4 pick in the draft for a reason. I don't care if he has turf toe, just let him run in the open field and see what happens.
Cowboys (+7.5) over GIANTS
This game has Eli Manning stink fest written all over it. If the Dallas defense can play with the same grit and toughness they displayed in their last game, they have a shot even if Brooks Bollinger is throwing slant passes to Patrick Crayton.
SEAHAWKS (+7.5) over Eagles
I think this is a high scoring affair with Westbrook, McNabb, Jackson, Engram, J. Jones and a warm body at WR for Seattle all having big days. Additionally Holmgren and Reid can battle it out for the last XXXXXL jacket to wear on the sideline.
COLTS (-4.5) over Patriots
This game doesn't quite have the same meaning as last years slugfest, but somehow should still be a high scoring game. Wayne, Clark (damn you Clark for costing me a W one league), Pey-Pey, Moss, BenJarvus and Faulk all have big games in this one.
Steelers (+2.5) over REDSKINS
Ahh, my beloved Redskins. I don't ask for much, but if you could win this game and shut the Steelers fans traps for one week, I would really appreciate it. Our defensive doesn't have Jason Taylor and Shawn Springs, but then again the Steelers are really banged up as well. I see a really low scoring game, with maybe one combined touchdown. I really like Shaun Suisham and Jeff Reed in this game.
Last week: 5-9
Your Weekly John Daly Link
Apparently John Daly passed out at a Hooters. Sounds about right. Compliments to CWM (Coworker Mike) for passing along this link.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
New Guns N' Roses Single Out
I'm excited the new Guns N' Roses song is out, but we waited almost two decades for this? Quite disappointed in Chinese Democracy, but I suppose people have been waiting so long, there was no way the first single was going to live up to expectations.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Week 8 Picks
Just like in week 6, I didn't watch any Sunday football games in week 7. I did see the Skins/Browns game in person, but it wasn't the most ideal environment to analyze football. Therefore, gamblers beware. On to the week 8 picks!
Home team in caps.
RAVENS -7½ over Raiders
I've got a new idea for local Oakland TV commercials. You know that Direct TV ad where Craig T. Nelson looks on in horror as he realizes he is still watching basic cable instead of switching to direct TV? Instead of some low rent movie, they should just be showing Raiders games, featuring coach Tom...Cable. Zing!
SAINTS (in London)(+3½) over Chargers
West coast teams are something like 0-47 playing on the east coast this season, so playing in London at eight time zones away must be even worse for west coast teams. Even without Bush, I like the Saints in this one.
JETS (-11½) over Chiefs
The Jets are a classic 7-9 or 8-8 team. Win at home, lose on the road and occasionally drop games to crappy teams. Well, you don't get much worse than Kansas City this season. In the last few days, I've heard name like Joey Harrington, Daunte Culpepper, Mark Rypien and Doug Flutie tossed around as possible backups for the Chiefs. Give me the the Jets in possibly the most unwatchable game of the day.
Bills (- 2½) over DOLPHINS
Just when we thought the Bills were overrated, they go and do something like this (beat the Chargers)...and totally redeem themselves. I think teams have figured out the Wildcat.
BUCS (+5½) over Cowboys
If the Cowboys lose this game, Wade Phillips is going to be replaced by Jason Garrett. For all the Cowboys fans that hopped on and off the bandwagon the last few months, there are still a couple of spots left on the Skins bandwagon. Last stop: Tampa Bay.
EAGLES (-7½) over Falcons
Both of these teams are coming off much needed byes, so they should be healthy. If Westbrook plays, I like the Eagles to dominate. Also, this is a bit of a homecoming for Matt Ryan who grew up an Eagles fan, but Matty Ice will be a little nervous playing in front of the locals.
PATRIOTS (-7½) over Rams
Maybe it just took a couple of games for Matt Cassel to figure out the system. I mean, the guy had not started a game since high school, give him a break. Or the Denver defense is just really, really bad. Perhaps a combination of the two. Either way, I say the Rams come back to earth.
PANTHERS (-4½) over Cardinals
I have a simple formula for Cardinals games for the remainder of the season. Win at home. Win on the road against lousy teams. Lose on the road to solid teams. Carolina certainly qualifies as solid so even if Q Boldin plays, I've got to take the Panthers at home.
LIONS (+7½) over Redskins
The Redskins never blow anyone out and always win close games. Even though Detroit is the local Midwestern representative for league doormat (although Kansas City might have an argument as well), I see them playing a passionate game with nothing to lose. In the end, Portis' running and the Skins defense is too much for the Lions.
Browns (+7½) over JAGUARS
Dear Braylon Edwards fan I heckled at the Redskins game,
I would think twice about wearing that jersey to a DC sporting event any time soon. Go back to Shaker Heights.
Yours truly,
Belligerent fan wearing youth medium 1991 Skins windbreaker.
STEELERS (-2½) over Giants
This game should be a real barnburner. No Willy Parker--no problem. Enter Mewelde Moore from stage right. I'm worried about the Giants D line harassing Big Ben and pounding him into the ketchup soaked field at Pitt, but I think the Steelers do just enough to win by a field goal.
49ERS (-2½) over Seahawks
R.I.P. Mike Nolan's suit. How could the 49ers fire a man so immaculately dressed? So many questions. So few answers. I think Charles Haley comes out of retirement to harass Seneca Wallace/Charlie Frye/Elizabeth Hasselbeck just enough to win.
Bengals (+9½ ) over TEXANS
Do you know how to go from 0-4 to 3-4? Play the Dolphins, Lions and Ben Gals in three consecutive weeks. The Hahvahd guy is starting at QB again for Cinci, so give me the Texans.
Colts (+3½) over TITANS
I can't figure out this Colts team. Whenever I think they will lose, they win. Whenever they should lose, they win. The Colts are like some cheesy, horror movie villain. Just when you think they're dead, they pop out at the last second and kill one more good guy. I still think the Titans win this division, but the Colts should take the Monday nighter in my upset du jour.
Last week: 7-6
Home team in caps.
RAVENS -7½ over Raiders
I've got a new idea for local Oakland TV commercials. You know that Direct TV ad where Craig T. Nelson looks on in horror as he realizes he is still watching basic cable instead of switching to direct TV? Instead of some low rent movie, they should just be showing Raiders games, featuring coach Tom...Cable. Zing!
SAINTS (in London)
West coast teams are something like 0-47 playing on the east coast this season, so playing in London at eight time zones away must be even worse for west coast teams. Even without Bush, I like the Saints in this one.
JETS (-11½) over Chiefs
The Jets are a classic 7-9 or 8-8 team. Win at home, lose on the road and occasionally drop games to crappy teams. Well, you don't get much worse than Kansas City this season. In the last few days, I've heard name like Joey Harrington, Daunte Culpepper, Mark Rypien and Doug Flutie tossed around as possible backups for the Chiefs. Give me the the Jets in possibly the most unwatchable game of the day.
Bills (- 2½) over DOLPHINS
Just when we thought the Bills were overrated, they go and do something like this (beat the Chargers)...and totally redeem themselves. I think teams have figured out the Wildcat.
BUCS (+5½) over Cowboys
If the Cowboys lose this game, Wade Phillips is going to be replaced by Jason Garrett. For all the Cowboys fans that hopped on and off the bandwagon the last few months, there are still a couple of spots left on the Skins bandwagon. Last stop: Tampa Bay.
EAGLES (-7½) over Falcons
Both of these teams are coming off much needed byes, so they should be healthy. If Westbrook plays, I like the Eagles to dominate. Also, this is a bit of a homecoming for Matt Ryan who grew up an Eagles fan, but Matty Ice will be a little nervous playing in front of the locals.
PATRIOTS (-7½) over Rams
Maybe it just took a couple of games for Matt Cassel to figure out the system. I mean, the guy had not started a game since high school, give him a break. Or the Denver defense is just really, really bad. Perhaps a combination of the two. Either way, I say the Rams come back to earth.
PANTHERS (-4½) over Cardinals
I have a simple formula for Cardinals games for the remainder of the season. Win at home. Win on the road against lousy teams. Lose on the road to solid teams. Carolina certainly qualifies as solid so even if Q Boldin plays, I've got to take the Panthers at home.
LIONS (+7½) over Redskins
The Redskins never blow anyone out and always win close games. Even though Detroit is the local Midwestern representative for league doormat (although Kansas City might have an argument as well), I see them playing a passionate game with nothing to lose. In the end, Portis' running and the Skins defense is too much for the Lions.
Browns (+7½) over JAGUARS
Dear Braylon Edwards fan I heckled at the Redskins game,
I would think twice about wearing that jersey to a DC sporting event any time soon. Go back to Shaker Heights.
Yours truly,
Belligerent fan wearing youth medium 1991 Skins windbreaker.
STEELERS (-2½) over Giants
This game should be a real barnburner. No Willy Parker--no problem. Enter Mewelde Moore from stage right. I'm worried about the Giants D line harassing Big Ben and pounding him into the ketchup soaked field at Pitt, but I think the Steelers do just enough to win by a field goal.
49ERS (-2½) over Seahawks
R.I.P. Mike Nolan's suit. How could the 49ers fire a man so immaculately dressed? So many questions. So few answers. I think Charles Haley comes out of retirement to harass Seneca Wallace/Charlie Frye/Elizabeth Hasselbeck just enough to win.
Bengals (+9½ ) over TEXANS
Do you know how to go from 0-4 to 3-4? Play the Dolphins, Lions and Ben Gals in three consecutive weeks. The Hahvahd guy is starting at QB again for Cinci, so give me the Texans.
Colts (+3½) over TITANS
I can't figure out this Colts team. Whenever I think they will lose, they win. Whenever they should lose, they win. The Colts are like some cheesy, horror movie villain. Just when you think they're dead, they pop out at the last second and kill one more good guy. I still think the Titans win this division, but the Colts should take the Monday nighter in my upset du jour.
Last week: 7-6
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Flying Shoe Sparks Controversy
A Florida man sues strip club alleging a stripper's shoe caused him grave injuries. Louisville Smuggler, is that you?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Big Tree Fall Hard
...because watching people fall down is funny. Skip to the 2:52 if you must, but the buildup is great.
Citgo Sign Burns
Via deadspin, the Citgo Sign behind Fenway Park caught fire. Certainly not a good omen for the playoff chances.
Vanity Fair Article
You must read this Vanity Fair article about the Italian confidence man Raffaello Follieri charming and seducing Anne Hathaway, potential investors, and even President Clinton. The article reads like the Talented Mr. Ripley trailer.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Trader Joes Moving to the UWS
$3 chuck? Yes please. If Trader Joes moves to the Upper West Side, maybe I'll actually start grocery shopping. Then again, I lived a block away from a TJ's in DC, and didn't really go that often. But I could be motivated.
Week 7 Picks
I wasn't able to watch any football this past weekend, so there is a strong possibility of 4-10 weekend. Gamblers beware.On to the Week 7 picks...Haiku Style!
Home team in caps.
Titans (-7.5) over CHIEFS
White eats ten pound steak
johnson channels inner bolt
lets build on that herm
Chargers (+3.5) over BILLS
Edwards is concussed
tomlinson runs wild in buff
cheese grater shave norv
Steelers (-8.5) over BENGALS
Long last name is fresh
always tell a harvard man
eighty five is nuts
DOLPHINS (-2.5) over Ravens
Wildcat runneth over
ravens o all time worst
puff puff pass ricky
RAMS (+10.5) over Cowboys
Ewes upset my skins
romo out with a pinkie
ewes losers no more
Vikings (+3.5) over BEARS
Peterson is due
rumblin' for a buck fifty
and three scores all day
PANTHERS (-2.5) over Saints
All south teams are same
this game bores me to no end
'lina by a field goal
49ers (+11.5) over GIANTS
I see it clearly
manning throws interception
niners cover the spread
TEXANS (-7.5) over Lions
Kitna goes on shelf
orlovsky runs out of gas
texans in a route
RAIDERS (+3.5) over Jets
Davis the vampire
sucks the raiders will to live
seabass kicks the winner
Browns (+8.5) over REDSKINS
Booked tampa ticket
the super bowl or nothing
skins must win this game
Colts (-2.5) over PACKERS
Don't fear lambeau field
peyton back to his old tricks
colts dominate game
BUCS (-6.5) over Seahawks
No hasselbeck means
bucs d should send frye packing
walrus is not happy
PATRIOTS (-4.5) over Broncos
After a pats loss
belichick wants revenge game
broncos are in trouble
Last week: 6-8
Monday, October 13, 2008
Explaining Blogengood
I often get asked how do you do that magic you do? The answer is simple. The number of posts correspond directly to the amount of work I have during the day. I've attached a crude chart for those that still don't understand.
My day so far...Part 2
The fleece hammock didn't work, so now I've stacked boxes on my desk and rolled the fleece into a ball to rest against the wall of boxes. More effective.
Columbus Day
Why? Why do I have work today? I thought this was a national holiday? So many questions, so few answers.
My day so far...
It was a long weekend. Hosted 10 of KC's friends at my house for a wedding on Sunday. The festivities coupled with the Redskins loss have left me dragging today. Currently, I'm trying to attach my fleece from my cabinet above my desk to my shoulder creating a soft, hammock-like pillow so I can gently rest my head. If I had a bit more energy, I might be able to pull this off.
I tried some coffee called "Dark Magic" which sounds mystical and profound, but is really just strong black water. The Dark Magic isn't really working, thus proving that there is no substitute for 8 sober hours of REM sleep. Therefore, the fleece pillow is the only option.
I tried some coffee called "Dark Magic" which sounds mystical and profound, but is really just strong black water. The Dark Magic isn't really working, thus proving that there is no substitute for 8 sober hours of REM sleep. Therefore, the fleece pillow is the only option.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Sarah Palin's SAT scores
This is probably fake, but it certainly wouldn't suprise me if it was real.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Week 6 Picks
SAINTS (-7.5) over Raiders
Drew Brees has really impressed me recently, both by his play on the field and his ability to grow the Balti in his late 20's. Brees' knack for spreading the ball around the field means the Raiders won't be able to key on any receiver, negating their shutdown corners. Additionally, the 'aints should be fuming after their loss on Monday and will want revenge against the hapless Raiders. I contemplated taking the Raiders simply because of the shirt Brees was wearing in the MNF post game conference, but common sense won out.
Ravens (+6.5) over COLTS
If Sage Rosenfels doesn't completely self destruct in the last two minutes of the Texans/Colts game, the Texans win their home opener and the Colts are staring at a 1-3 start. Perhaps he and Jay Fiedler didn't perform the proper Rosh Hashanah duties. For whatever reason the Texans imploded, the Ravens shouldn't give the Colts many opportunities to score.
JETS (-5.5) over Bengals
How does Marv Lewis still have a job? The Bengals are 0-5 and haven't won a playoff game during his tenure. The Bengals defense can't hold any team to under 25 points and Brett Fav-rah threw six touchdown passes two weeks ago. The Jets are also coming off a bye week and shouldbe well rested to destroy. I like the Jets here--unless they play in their throwback uniforms.
Panthers (+2.5) over BUCS
Every Bucs game seems to have a line less than 3 points. Their games are just too close to call, and with either Jeff Garcia or Brian Griese taking the snaps, the Panthers look like the pick here.
Side note about Garcia. Is there a funnier story about Terrell Owens then when he called Garcia gay even though Garcia ended up marrying a Playboy Playmate of the year. How does anyone take TO seriously?
VIKINGS (-12½) over Lions
Did you know Barry Sanders could leg press 1500 lbs? I'm making this number up, but I wouldn't doubt his abilities. So unless Sanders is walking through the door, the Lions aren't doing anything this season. R.I.P Millen's stache.
FALCONS (+2.5) over Bears
Consider me an official member of the Matty Ice Bandwagon. Two wins at home. Check. Win on the road at Lambeau. Check. Winning record. Check. Is there anything Matty Ice can't do in this league? The Bears probably think their shit don't stank after running up the score against the horrendous Lions defense. I think Kyle Orton comes back to earth, and Matt Ryan and Michael Burner Turner have big games.
TEXANS (-3.5) over Dolphins
It's never a good sign if your running back has a better arm than your quarterback. Every week it seems a running back or wide receiver is throwing for a touchdown--off the the top of my head I can think of Chester Taylor, Antwaan Randel-El and Ronnie Brown throwing one this season. I think Steve Slaton might throw one to Andre Johnson. The NFL, if nothing else, is a copycat league.
Rams (+13.5) over REDSKINS
Book your tickets to Tampa Bay now, because the Redskins are certainly Super Bowl bound. However, they win close games, not blowouts. Their four wins have come by an average of 5 points. The Rams are terrible but have had two weeks to plan for this game. I like the Skins by 7-10 points.
BRONCOS (-2.5) over Jaguars
The Jags defense isn't nearly as good as the Bucs, so Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall should get back to their old ways on Sunday. The Jags couldn't stop Longlastname on Sunday night even though he had every conceivable injury known to man, so how are they going to stop the gunslinger from Nashvegas? Jack of the River might pop a couple of blood vessels after Marshall catches his second touchdown pass.
Eagles (-6.5) over 49ERS
This is a must win game for the Iggles after the 1st quarter meltdown against the eventual Super Bowl Champs. Westbrook has a rib. McNabb has a body. But the key is the Eagles defense. If the defense can force the Irish Bar into passing situations, they can key up on Isaac Bruce and shut down Frank Gore, they should get their offense back on the field.
CARDINALS (+5.5) over Cowboys
Apparently Kurt Warner was considering retirement after Boldin's injury since he felt responsible for the hit because of his errant throw. The only thing more exciting than playing quarterback in the NFL is bagging groceries, but in the end I think Warner made the right choice and decided to play out the rest of the season. The Cowboys got a necessary but difficult win against Cincinnati and certainly don't look like the unstoppable force they were in the beginning of the season. Also, Wade Phillips is coaching the Cowboys, so the coaching edge goes to the other team.
SEAHAWKS (-2.5) over Packers
The normally reliable Seahawks looked TERRIBLE last week. Seriously, the worst team in the history of the NFL, and this is including the Herm "Lets Build On That" Edwards coached Kansas City Chiefs. But the friendly confines of Seattle should change their fortunes. Matt Hasselbeck has Bobby Engram back from injury, so he now has a credible receiver. Since Aaron Rodgers is a little banged up, I like the Seahawks.
Patriots (+4.5) over CHARGERS
Matt Cassel, welcome to the big show! Cassel threw a bomb to Randy Moss last week, assuring Moss owners that they shouldn't sell for 30 cents on the dollar. Cheese grater face was outcoached in Miami, and will certainly be clutching his laminated play sheet while staring off into space wondering how the Patriots are beating him at home.
Giants (-7.5) over BROWNS
Let me set the scene for you: On Sunday, as the Browns were enjoying their bye week, Romeo Crennel was in a Cleveland boutique store getting fitted for 56-inch fupa khakis. As the tailor was measuring the fupa, Crennel was watching the Giants destroy the Seahawks and wondering how he would botch timeouts during opportune times in the upcoming Giants/Browns game. Giants by two scores.
Last week: 5-6-2
Drew Brees has really impressed me recently, both by his play on the field and his ability to grow the Balti in his late 20's. Brees' knack for spreading the ball around the field means the Raiders won't be able to key on any receiver, negating their shutdown corners. Additionally, the 'aints should be fuming after their loss on Monday and will want revenge against the hapless Raiders. I contemplated taking the Raiders simply because of the shirt Brees was wearing in the MNF post game conference, but common sense won out.
Ravens (+6.5) over COLTS
If Sage Rosenfels doesn't completely self destruct in the last two minutes of the Texans/Colts game, the Texans win their home opener and the Colts are staring at a 1-3 start. Perhaps he and Jay Fiedler didn't perform the proper Rosh Hashanah duties. For whatever reason the Texans imploded, the Ravens shouldn't give the Colts many opportunities to score.
JETS (-5.5) over Bengals
How does Marv Lewis still have a job? The Bengals are 0-5 and haven't won a playoff game during his tenure. The Bengals defense can't hold any team to under 25 points and Brett Fav-rah threw six touchdown passes two weeks ago. The Jets are also coming off a bye week and shouldbe well rested to destroy. I like the Jets here--unless they play in their throwback uniforms.
Panthers (+2.5) over BUCS
Every Bucs game seems to have a line less than 3 points. Their games are just too close to call, and with either Jeff Garcia or Brian Griese taking the snaps, the Panthers look like the pick here.
Side note about Garcia. Is there a funnier story about Terrell Owens then when he called Garcia gay even though Garcia ended up marrying a Playboy Playmate of the year. How does anyone take TO seriously?
VIKINGS (-12½) over Lions
Did you know Barry Sanders could leg press 1500 lbs? I'm making this number up, but I wouldn't doubt his abilities. So unless Sanders is walking through the door, the Lions aren't doing anything this season. R.I.P Millen's stache.
FALCONS (+2.5) over Bears
Consider me an official member of the Matty Ice Bandwagon. Two wins at home. Check. Win on the road at Lambeau. Check. Winning record. Check. Is there anything Matty Ice can't do in this league? The Bears probably think their shit don't stank after running up the score against the horrendous Lions defense. I think Kyle Orton comes back to earth, and Matt Ryan and Michael Burner Turner have big games.
TEXANS (-3.5) over Dolphins
It's never a good sign if your running back has a better arm than your quarterback. Every week it seems a running back or wide receiver is throwing for a touchdown--off the the top of my head I can think of Chester Taylor, Antwaan Randel-El and Ronnie Brown throwing one this season. I think Steve Slaton might throw one to Andre Johnson. The NFL, if nothing else, is a copycat league.
Rams (+13.5) over REDSKINS
Book your tickets to Tampa Bay now, because the Redskins are certainly Super Bowl bound. However, they win close games, not blowouts. Their four wins have come by an average of 5 points. The Rams are terrible but have had two weeks to plan for this game. I like the Skins by 7-10 points.
BRONCOS (-2.5) over Jaguars
The Jags defense isn't nearly as good as the Bucs, so Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall should get back to their old ways on Sunday. The Jags couldn't stop Longlastname on Sunday night even though he had every conceivable injury known to man, so how are they going to stop the gunslinger from Nashvegas? Jack of the River might pop a couple of blood vessels after Marshall catches his second touchdown pass.
Eagles (-6.5) over 49ERS
This is a must win game for the Iggles after the 1st quarter meltdown against the eventual Super Bowl Champs. Westbrook has a rib. McNabb has a body. But the key is the Eagles defense. If the defense can force the Irish Bar into passing situations, they can key up on Isaac Bruce and shut down Frank Gore, they should get their offense back on the field.
CARDINALS (+5.5) over Cowboys
Apparently Kurt Warner was considering retirement after Boldin's injury since he felt responsible for the hit because of his errant throw. The only thing more exciting than playing quarterback in the NFL is bagging groceries, but in the end I think Warner made the right choice and decided to play out the rest of the season. The Cowboys got a necessary but difficult win against Cincinnati and certainly don't look like the unstoppable force they were in the beginning of the season. Also, Wade Phillips is coaching the Cowboys, so the coaching edge goes to the other team.
SEAHAWKS (-2.5) over Packers
The normally reliable Seahawks looked TERRIBLE last week. Seriously, the worst team in the history of the NFL, and this is including the Herm "Lets Build On That" Edwards coached Kansas City Chiefs. But the friendly confines of Seattle should change their fortunes. Matt Hasselbeck has Bobby Engram back from injury, so he now has a credible receiver. Since Aaron Rodgers is a little banged up, I like the Seahawks.
Patriots (+4.5) over CHARGERS
Matt Cassel, welcome to the big show! Cassel threw a bomb to Randy Moss last week, assuring Moss owners that they shouldn't sell for 30 cents on the dollar. Cheese grater face was outcoached in Miami, and will certainly be clutching his laminated play sheet while staring off into space wondering how the Patriots are beating him at home.
Giants (-7.5) over BROWNS
Let me set the scene for you: On Sunday, as the Browns were enjoying their bye week, Romeo Crennel was in a Cleveland boutique store getting fitted for 56-inch fupa khakis. As the tailor was measuring the fupa, Crennel was watching the Giants destroy the Seahawks and wondering how he would botch timeouts during opportune times in the upcoming Giants/Browns game. Giants by two scores.
Last week: 5-6-2
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Dick Fuld Gets the Knockout Punch
The image of a disgruntled Lehman employee punching the boss because of Lehman's bankruptcy. It's just too much for me. Compliments of the Bangle Berry.
I imagine the scene went something like this:
I imagine the scene went something like this:
Monday, October 6, 2008
Top NFL fans
Here is my objective list for top fans in the NFL:
1. Redskins
11. Browns
I want to put the Browns in the top-10, I really do. I'm holding them back because their team relocated to Baltimore in 1996. You could blame Art Model for screwing over northeastern Ohio, but you can't blame the fans. Even still, this drops them down a few points.
32. Patriots
This team was ready to move to Hartford 10 years ago, so all the Patriots fan/bandwagon douches can just sit down for a while.
Burgundy & Gold
The Redskins are the best team in the NFL and you can't convince me otherwise. Giants, Cowboys and Titans fans can go crawl back under the rock they came from.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Weapons or Firearms during the LSAT
Wha????? A weekend post on blogengood??? What, you think my pornbox/emailing device at home doesn't have the capability to post entries on the website? Well, you sir, are quite mistaken.
I only make the post for this fact: At the LSAT today, the following items were prohibited during the exam: weapons or firearms, ear plugs, books, backpacks, handbags, papers of any kind, calculators, rulers, timers, listening devices, cellular phones, recording or photographic devices, pagers, beepers, headsets, and/or other electronic devices.
Note the WEAPONS OR FIREARMS. I love how they so nonchalantly throw earplugs next to weapons or firearms.
This statement was read before the exam started and everyone had a good laugh. Everyone was thinking...who would bring a gun to the LSAT exam, how preposterous? Well, the snakes at LSAC, the creators of the LSAT exam, are wilier than you would expect. By the end of the 5th section I actually did want to brandish a firearm and get out of dodge. Luckily, the rules were in place, otherwise things could have gotten ugly.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Planty
I haven't watered my house plant in weeks, and yet it continues to flourish. It's lush and green and and quite pluckly. I think it's learned to live in desert like conditions. I believe in tough love.
Week 5 Picks
Home team in Caps.
Patriots (-3) over 49ers
If Bill Belichick can't figure out a way to get Randy Moss the ball, the Patriots and one of my fantasy teams are screwed. Somehow, I think Bill spent the bye week doing cool stuff no one even knows about. Pats to win by a touchdown.
TEXANS (+3) over Colts
You know how a basketball or baseball playoff series doesn't start until the home team loses a game? Well, Houston hasn't played a home game yet and its already October. The Colts are coming off a bye which should have them well rested. I wish I had a Hank Goldbergesque stat that said something like the Colts are 4-1 against the spread on the road coming off a bye in week 4. But alas, I have no such stat so I will go with my gut on this one. Colts win in a squeaker
Chargers (-6.5) over DOLPHINS
In classic Norv Turner fashion the Chargers were poorly coached coming out of the gate and are only now starting to right the ship. For collective Redskins fans, I wave a single, menacing fist towards cheese grater face for running the mid-90's Redskins into the ground. I respect what Big Tuna (not Jim Halpert) has done in Miami so I'm really tempted to go with the Fish here. But talent wins over coaching and management. Chargers by a touchdown.
Redskins (+6) over EAGLES
Aside from their week 1 stinker, no team has impressed as much as the Redskins. And yet they are still six point dogs to an Eagles team that lost to the Bears last week. 
No one, not even Vegas, gives the Skins respect. But they will after this game. Friend of the blog, citizenjake, reports Brian Westbrook's brother, Byron Westbrook, would be very surprised if his brother played this week. The Eagles without Westbrook are like the Bulls without Jordan, the Athletics without Van Popple or Blogengood without Livengood. Skins to win it outright.
LIONS (+3.5) over Bears
It's the end of an era in Motown with the firing of Matt Millen. To Lions fans and players, a great burden has been lifted from their shoulders. The Lions lose Millen's 'stache but gain cohesion and solidarity in the front office. The Bears are coming off a lucky win against the Westbrook-less Eagles while the Lions should be more focused and hungry for a win. Yep, give me the Lions at home.
Seahawks (+7) over GIANTS
The Seahawks finally get some decent receivers back from injury, so they know have the fortune of resting Steve Largent. On the Giants side of the ball, Plax the wife beater, is suspended for a game for missing team meetings. I love how the Giants and the NFL suspended him for missing a team meeting, not for beating his wife. Speedster Dom Hixon starts in Plax's spot and ishould run by the Seahawks secondary. Eli Manning will inevitably underthrow him and have the pass picked off. Giants win a close one.
RAVENS (+3) over Titans
How come their is no mention of the Ravens in the Wire? In season 4, Namond Brice wears a throwback Eagles jersey and no one raises an eyebrow? The Orioles are mentioned--McNulty and Bunk even go to a game. But the Ravens get no love in West Baltimore. Somehow I think this make Ray Lewis upset, which isn't good news for Kerry Collins, Chris Johnson or LenDale "Triple Deuce" White.
PANTHERS (-9.5) over Chiefs
The Chiefs threw a wrench into my titanium alloy lock last week when they forced 47 turnovers and beat the Broncos. Therefore I can't take the Chiefs on principle. I will agree the team looks better with Damon Huard at the helm, but the fact remains...they are still the bungling Chefs. The Panthers defense is a lot better than the Broncos woeful unit, so Larry Johnson won't be able to run wild. Panthers in a romp.
BRONCOS (-3) over Bucs
Cutler's insulin level must have been really low last week since he turned the ball over 58 times. I didn't watch the game, but was I following with updates on my phone. Every time I refreshed, the caption read "Cutler Intercepted by Kansas City." Somehow the friendly confines of Denver and the thin air propel this team to victory, even if Cutler throws 67 picks.
Patriots (-3) over 49ers
If Bill Belichick can't figure out a way to get Randy Moss the ball, the Patriots and one of my fantasy teams are screwed. Somehow, I think Bill spent the bye week doing cool stuff no one even knows about. Pats to win by a touchdown.
CARDINALS (even) over Bills
This might be the hardest game on the board, evidenced by the Vegas line. This Bills team has benefited from an easy schedule and since they haven't had success for the better part of a decade, I think their young players start believing the hype and lose focus. They've fallen behind the past two games and were only able to come back since their opponents were terrible. The Cardinals went 0-2 on their East Coast trip, but that's only because they were staying in a hotel near Tyson's Corner. That would put anyone in a sour mood. I think they rebound nicely and knock off the undefeated Bills.
Bengals (+17) over COWBOYS
The Bengals are terrible and might be without an injured Carson Palmer. The Cowboys are coming off a loss to the future Super Bowl champs. The Cowboys are a good football team, but no team outside of the 2007 Patriots should not be 17 point favorites. That line is just too high, especially for a Wade Phillips team. Also, its never a good sign when an owner comes down to the sideline as Jerry Jones did last week against the Skins. The Cowboys are one upset loss away from crumbling under the weight of Texas sized egos.
JAGUARS (-4) over Steelers
Did you see the Monday night game? Roethlisberger and the Steelers were under pressure the entire game by Ray Lewis and the Ravens. They lost offensive lineman Kendall Simmons for the season, further depleting a ravaged o-line. The Jags should feast on Roethlisberger and by the end of this game he'll feel like he just fell off his motorcycle.
SAINTS (-3) over Vikings
The Vikings can stop the run but not the pass. Brees averages between 1650-1800 passing yards a game. So so that settles it, I like the Saints. I understand Bryant McKinney comes back from suspension, that should open up running lanes for Adrian Peterson, but the Saints should be able to hold on at home.
Week 4: not so good.
Week 4: not so good.
Oh Africa, Brave Africa
Apparently American Psycho is being adapted for Broadway. I'm usually not a theater buff, but I suppose I can make an exception. I wonder how the business card scene will play out.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Lloyd from Entourage Imposter
Somewho looks like Rex Lee, the actor who plays Lloyd on Entourage, snuck into a party and got David Beckham to buy him drinks the entire night. Did the guy yell this as he made it into the VIP area?
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